“At the moment of orgasm you are living fully and totally in the present. An orgasm is anticipated, like the sunrise on a new day, and unexpected, like winning a prize in a competition you can’t recall having entered. Time freezes and there isn’t a feeling of loss, a void, a little death, but a reminder that of all human activity, none is more perfect.” ~ Chloe Thurlow
Orgasm is not just a way to feel pleasure.
Orgasm is also a way to bond emotionally with our sexual partner and experience our inner self on a deeper level. Or so we think, hope and strive to do.
Women struggle with orgasm on a grand scale, and I find this worthy of contemplation.
Now, some of us will say that orgasm isn’t all that necessary, that a true connection with our partner can happened sans the fireworks.
True, sex is about much more than orgasm—but should we fake one and, furthermore, should we give up on them altogether if in the past they have been hard to reach?
I’ve faked orgasms with early lovers and am totally hip to why I felt compelled to do so.
We’re People Pleasers
We women feel that it’s up to us to make anything and everything smooth and peaceable.
Only it’s not working. Creating a good feeling for someone else while ignoring our own needs is the reason so many of us are burnt out in relationships.
As soon as you fake that first orgasm, you’ve set a few precedents. One is that now he’s going to wonder why you didn’t orgasm the second time you got together—his mad love skills aside—and will expect a repeat performance of all that moaning, eyes rolled to the back of the head, back arching magnificence.
You’re also setting yourself up for complete in-authenticity, which I’m afraid you’d only have yourself to blame for—if after twenty years you’re still performing like you’re on Broadway or something.
The truth is, he can handle it if you don’t come. Faking it only destroys what’s real between you.
All the Reasons and 5 Ways to Have One here…3 Reasons Women Fake Orgasms and 5 Ways to Have One. {Video} | elephant journal
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